Pain

I understand pain.  I know the feeling of helplessness, hopelessness, and weakness.  I know what it is like to cry yourself to sleep almost every night wondering if there will ever be an end to what you are going through.  I understand, because I am human.
            I also have a God who understands.  Jesus was also human, and he felt the pain of rejection, along with the physical pain of crucifixion.  We are told that he sympathizes with us.  So why does he then allow us to go through what we go through?
            Pain is a tool God uses to reach you and others.  When you are down to nothing, you are way more likely to hear God whisper to you.  It doesn’t feel good, but lessons learned during storms seem to stick better than lessons taught to you during moments of calmness in your life. 
            God can also use pain to reach others.  Pain is a microphone.  How you react to your trials shows the world around you what you believe.  It is a living testimony of God.  Again, it hurts, but it brings glory to God. 
            Yet, are these facts comforting through a trial?  I don’t really think so.  To me, I can become extremely bitter towards God because of my circumstances.  I get angry sometimes that I am going through all that I am going through for God’s glory.  Then God spoke to me.
           
            “Daughter, I love you.  I chose you before time began.  You are my creation and I delight over you.  But I can’t leave you the way you are, I love you too much.  Come to me, and let me heal your heart.  Let me show you my heart, and teach you to become more like me.  I rejoice over you with singing, my daughter.  I will redeem you.  The world cannot define you, because I have already overcome.  Lean on me, and I will supply all that you want and need.”

            I know some people think that I am crazy when I say that I can hear God, but I won’t deny that I can.  He speaks to me all the time, when I choose to listen.  It’s not a loud voice, but a soft, gentle, comforting, whisper over my soul.  (1 King 19:11-14)
            My pastor did his sermon on pain last week.  More specifically rejection, but I think in all pain there is some form of rejection.  I would highly recommend it (link at bottom of article).  One thing that most caught my attention was to remember the truth in times of pain.  When you speak out “God is good all the time, all the time He is good.” You don’t have the chance to be angry at God.  You can rejoice, even in your trials. 
            My friend also gave me a valuable piece of advice.  When God asks you to do something that you see as painful to help heal, you might as well do it.  You are already broken, already in pain.  What obedience is going to do is help you heal.  Obedience takes the infection out of the wound, and let’s God put his spiritual medicine, and bandage on your wound. But just like with everything else, He will wait for you to allow Him to.  Don’t fight Him on this.
            I am human.  I can’t tell you why bad things happen.  I can’t tell you when your pain will go away, and I can’t tell you what your future is going to look like.  But God is faithful, and He will redeem you.  You are too precious to Him for Him to leave you in this time.  He who started this work in you, will be faithful to complete it.  He will make you white as snow. 
            You aren’t defined by the world’s standards.  You are far above that.  You live by God’s standards.  He will never see you as worthless, a lost cause, boring, ugly, or anything else this world has labeled you as.  You are His child.  He delights in you!

Link to sermon:   http://www.engagetruth.com/media/audio/612/pain-peace
           

A Glimpse at Love

"Daughter, I love you.  Remember, I chose you before time began.  I delight in you.  But, I love you too much to leave you where you are at.  My daughter, I don't want to see you in pain.  Every tear you have cried, I hold in my hands.  You are so precious to me, and I want to redeem you.  Lean into me through thick and think; I won't leave you.  I am forming you in my image, and I will not abandon you in this."

       "You are not defined by anything in this world.  I have willingly paid the ultimate price.  You are mine, and mine alone."

      
        You are not ordinary, but a royal priesthood, a holy nation.  You have been brought into the light, to be stars for God.  He has called you to do things only you can do.  (This is actually from Levi Lusko’s Microphone series)


       This may all seem ordinary teachings about God, but how ordinary are they when they are spoken directly to you from God.  I honestly do not have the words to describe the experience I had, but I can tell you this.  After God spoke to me, He poured out His love to the point that me senses were overwhelmed.  Love and peace took over my body, and I was left breathless with tears in my eyes, but that isn't the amazing part.  The part that I marvel over today, outside of the amount of love that was poured out upon me, was how my soul reacted. 
       As God poured out His love to me, my soul started praising.  It came into complete submission to God, and sang glory to God, in a way that was not known to me.  My lips couldn't form words; physically I had been incapacitated.  As my senses came back to me, my soul continued to praise.  My brain couldn't make sense of that kind of love, so my soul praised more. 
       It reminded me of Revelations.  Specifically, the one I found being Revelations 5:12-13

12saying with a loud voice:
       "Worthy is the Lamb who was slain
        To receive power and riches and wisdom,
        And strength and honor and glory and blessing!"     
 13And every creature which is in heave and on earth, and under the earth and such as are in the sea, and all that are in them, I heard saying:
       "Blessing and honor and glory and power
        Be to Him who sits on the throne,
       And to the Lamb, forever and ever!"

       When I came back to my senses, God whispered to me again,

       “This is only a glimpse of my love for you.  This is only a glimpse of the love I hold for all my children.” 

       I hear God speak to me all the time, but this was that times infinity.  All I can do is sit is marvel, I can’t comprehend that kind of love, because it is so far beyond my human capacity.  The closest I can come is to say that my love for my family, compared to God’s love for me, is the compassion I would show to an acquaintance.  Definitely there, but small compared to those I am invested in. 

       And I’ll just be honest, I don’t feel worthy in the slightest to have felt this.  And only through Christ’s blood can I become worthy, but I am so beyond thankful for this opportunity God gave me.  I have been blessed, and I wish more than anything that everyone could experience this glimpse of love. 

                The take away is that God loves us truly more than we can imagine.  We don’t deserve it, but that is why He sent His son for us, but not only that, but Christ willingly laid it down for us.  He couldn’t stand the thought of being separated from you.  You are that precious to Him.

This is a bit different than my other posts, because this was not taught to me like the other lessons.  I have never had God communicate to my this way, and I probably never will again. It was a true revelation that He gave me, both to help heal my soul, and to share with others.  I had another lesson planned to post, but I wanted this to be shown instead.  

      

A Misleading Quote

“When you're going through hard times and you wondering where is God, just remember; the teacher is always quiet during a test.”

The quote has been given to me multiple times throughout my struggles in life.  It is meant to be comforting, yet I never found anything comforting about it.  I hated hearing that in my worst time, God was going to be silent and let me figure things out on my own.  Later I did some searching, and realized that while people say this to comfort others when they can’t hear God, this couldn’t be farther from the truth. 

In this current trial I am going through, I have heard God more than ever before, and here is why.  I am choosing to connect with Him.  To sit at His feet and spend time with Him.  The reality of the situation is simple.  We can’t hear God most of the time simply because we are too busy staying focused on ourselves instead of looking to Him. 

The Bible says God will never leave you, nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6,8), and when I dug a little further I found a few other verses that to me debunk the truth to this saying. 

“I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them”.  ~Isaiah 42:16

“There are many plans in a man’s heart, Nevertheless the LORD’S counsel—that will stand.”  ~Proverbs 19:21

There are also multiple times in Psalms that David, and other psalmist call out to God in their troubles, and He answers.  This was before Christ came, which means that the dynamic of the person/God relationship was different.  If God reached out to those who called out to Him in the Old Testament, wouldn’t he do the same in the New Testament and now? 

If you look at my last post about controlling emotions, you will see that one thing that was suggested to me was to serve so that my eyes were off myself, and on to others and God.  It is similar with this.  When our eyes are on ourselves, we will not hear God.  Let me rephrase that; we cannot hear God.  Because we have free will, He will allow us to try and solve our problems with worldly solutions.  However, if we turn our eyes completely on Him, He will not disappoint us.  He will meet us where we are at, and guide us through.  Just keep in mind He will usually only reveal the current step you have to take.  He won’t give you the whole picture, and that is okay.

One more thing, it is possible that He has told you exactly what to do, and you are just refusing to do so.  He isn’t going to change His mind.  Be faithful, and do as He has asked.